BREAKING POINT

Absurd, of course, but what would he say, if he were to return now, suddenly and unexpectedly and find her here with Jeremy? Would he understand? No, he had been too young to realize what loneliness meant and he believed in woman’s essential goodness. He had never been as broadminded as Jeremy. She could not imagine a Howard grown older and wiser, for he had been so young when he died. She, herself, had changed, grown up, despite what Jeremy said sometimes about her immaturity. And that first marriage was past, deep in the past. It was almost as if it had never been.

Penny was preparing the white sauce for a cauliflower when Jeremy arrived that evening. She heard his footsteps outside the door, and the silence as he stopped to feel for the key under the carpet on the top step where she had told him she would hide it since he hated taking the key out because he always misplaced it. The door opened. He called out:

“Hello, darling! I’ve got a surprise for you”

“Wait” she called back. “I’m heating some milk. I can’t leave it. I will be out in a minute. What is it, Jeremy?”

“Surprise” Jeremy repeated. “I’ll put it in the sitting room”

Penny felt suddenly gay and childishly excited. She was almost certain that Jeremy’s surprise would be an engagement ring. She wondered feverishly what stone he had chosen. Not that she really minded

Anything Jeremy chose would be lovely.

Breathlessly, she finished her cooking, and went into the sitting room.

“Well” Jeremy said. “What do you think of it?” and he stood aside. On the sofa lay a small, silky liver and white spaniel puppy.

“Spaniel!” Jeremy said.

If she had been disappointed, Penny hardly had time to be aware of it. All that was maternal in her rushed to the fore. She fell on her knees beside the tiny silky bundle and gathered it into her arms.

“Oh, the darling! The darling?” she said, brushing her lips against the puppy’s long floppy ears. “Oh, Jeremy, he’s beautiful. Or is it a she?”

“It’s a dog alright” Jeremy said proudly. “Nice little chap”

Penny was speechless with love. Already she adored the puppy. Gratitude to Jeremy shone in her eyes.

“What will we call him?” she breathed. “Have you decided on a name, Jeremy?”

“I left that to you!” Jeremy said. “He’s yours, you know”

“No, he’s ours” Penny corrected. “Let him be ours, Jeremy, please. We will both have him. He will be our baby until we have one of our own. Jeremy, let’s call him Benjamin. I had a puppy once called Benjamin but he died of distemper and Aunt Ann wouldn’t let me get another one. I have always wanted another Benny ”

“Well, i don’t suppose he’s old enough to object” said Jeremy. “Unless he shows objection by puddling on the floor”

“He can puddle all he wants to” Penny said. “He’s so beautiful and cuddly and sweet. I don’t mind what he does”.

Jeremy laughed.

“How about keeping some of that love for me” he said. “I’m getting jealous”

Penny stood up quickly, sitting the puppy on the sofa from where he gazed up at her with mournful brown eyes. She put her arms around Jeremy’s neck and drew his face towards her.

“Darling, thank you! Thank you terribly” she said, and added after she had kissed him. “You will never need to be jealous anymore, Jeremy. I love you more than anything or anyone in the world”

But surely enough, Jeremy had cause to put that statement to the test on Sunday night.

They did not drive down to Sussex after all. Something had gone wrong with Jeremy’s car when they tried to start it on Saturday morning, and they finally had to give up the idea altogether. Jeremy had been slightly irritable about it until Penny pointed out that it was raining, anyway, and they would have far more fun playing with the puppy in front of a warm fire, and later dining somewhere in the West end.

It was not until Sunday evening when Jeremy said :

“I will be going on a trip with my boss on Thursday”

Then Penny remembered Audrey’s visit.

“Darling, can you change it to Monday?” she asked. “I have a girl friend coming to stay so we couldn’t be together that night anyhow”

“Of course I can’t change my boss’s plans” Jeremy told her, the sharpness of his voice inferring that Penny should have known better than to imagine such a thing. “I’m not my own boss you know” he added.Còntens bel0ngs to Nô(v)elDr/a/ma.Org

Penny felt a quick rush of anger spread over her face.

“There’s no need to be rude, Jeremy” she said not quite as calmly as she had intended. “I didn’t think, or I wouldn’t have suggested it. I’m sorry”

“It’s a damn nuisance but unavoidable” Jeremy said more reasonably. “You can put the girlfriend off, can’t you?”

“I’m so sorry, darling, but I can’t do that” penny said, her eyes pleading with him for understanding. “Audrey is my best friend and has seats booked for a concert too. Besides, i haven’t seen her for ages. She always stays with me when she comes to town as she hates hotels. She’d think it terribly odd if I refused her. I just can’t do it”

Jeremy’s chin took a stubborn line.

“Of course, if you would prefer her here instead of me…” he said pointedly.

Penny laughed suddenly at his childishness. It was a mistake.

“I can’t see anything particularly funny in my last remark” he said coldly.

Penny was surprised.. Really surprised to find that he was serious. Anger subsided and she went across to him, laying a hand on his arm, she said gently :

“Jeremy, honey, you are a silly old thing. You know i would rather have you than Audrey. Of course I would, but this is duty. Audrey is my friend and she hates hotels and besides, I do want see her and spend some time with her”

As she added those last few words, she knew she had said the wrong thing again. Jeremy took up the cudgel immediately.

“That’s exactly what I said just now, you would rather see her than me” he said.

Penny kept her temper with an effort.

“I didn’t say that, Jeremy. I said I wanted to see Audrey. Not that I would rather see her than you”

“Well, it’s your flat” Jeremy said, his voice hurt, cold. “You do what you want”