Confession
Declan … my love …
If you’re reading this … that means I’m gone …
I have been contemplating this decision for the longest time.
Our last meeting convinced me there is no hope for me ever to be together with you again.
I don’t want to live without you, especially when you love someone else on this earth.
God knows I tried to do that, and it’s killing me inside. It might as well kill me forever.
Damien is such a sweet boy. He doesn’t deserve this. He doesn’t deserve an unhappy mother who’s always bitter and angry because she couldn’t be with his father, who has no love for either of us.
He doesn’t deserve to be in a world where he is not loved and treated like he didn’t matter. I couldn’t give that to him because I can’t convince you to be the father he deserves.
So I’m not leaving him behind. He is mine. He is my heart and soul.
I promise this won’t hurt. Not as much as knowing that you don’t love me.
I hope you find what you lost with her when you were with me. I hope she’ll forgive you for loving me even for a brief moment, for not even a fraction of how much you love her.
I hope she’ll forgive you for this.
For what it’s worth, what we had was the most beautiful thing that ever happened in my life. That may be why it’s hard for me to accept it’s over.
With all my love … Sienna …
He crumpled the letter in his hand after reading it in the bedroom. It was too much for him to take. Sienna’s face stormed his head. Her smile. Her laughter. Her words. The last thing she said to him. The hurt he’d cause her. Followed by Damien’s.
He felt a sharp pang when he remembered that boy’s face. A face so much similar to his when he was a little boy. He stifled a sob, knowing Olivia was just outside the bedroom.
There was a limit to what he can take. And that was it. When Olivia confronted him in the living room, he knew he had to come clean, whatever the consequences. He couldn’t keep it to himself anymore. Not after he had convinced her to be involved in his mess.
She sat across from him. He could tell that she knew something was wrong, and she knew she was already in on it. The one person he had done everything he could to protect from his own lies. And now he was about to unleash the full power of the truth.
He didn’t know where to start. He just gave her the letter and watched as her face turned white. She stood up with the letter in her trembling hand.
“What is this?”
She knew. She just wanted him to explain what she understood about the situation.
“The man I killed … was her husband …” he replied.
She let go of the paper to cover her mouth with both hands and walked over to the window. He couldn’t see her face. She was dead quiet.
“I think he came here to kill me … for what I’ve caused them …” tears pouring out of his eyes. “I have done a terrible … terrible thing.”
For the first time in his life, Declan was admitting defeat.
“You had a son …” her voice was almost inaudible. Amid all the horror, it was the one thing that stand out. “And now he’s dead … because of what?” she muttered between her sobs. “What is going on, Declan? What is happening with us??”
He came over to her and embraced her from behind. “I love you … even if the world falls apart, that is the one thing I’m sure of … I love you … please believe me.”This text is property of Nô/velD/rama.Org.
She struggled to be free from him. She turned to look at him. “We have killed an entire family! Do you understand that?” She hit his arm as hard as she could. “And your own son?!” Then she pushed him. She screamed.
He pulled her in and hugged her as tight as he could. She was hysterical. All the years of lies and deceit had come down on her all at once.
“Why … Why, Declan? Why did you do this to me?” she wailed.
He shook his head. “I didn’t … I never wanted to hurt you. She was pregnant when I ended it, and I did my best to do my part … I provided for them … I couldn’t tell you … how could I?”
She fell on her knees to the ground. Her body gave in to the mental blows she was receiving.
He went down with her and groveled. “Livy … sweetheart …” he stroked her hair and held her face. “If I could do anything to take this all back … I would … there’s no one on earth I hate more than myself right now.”
He took his gun from under the coffee table. He had left it there after the shooting. He took her hand and let her hold the gun to his temple. “Just kill me … if that’s what you want … I don’t deserve to live … I know that … just pull the trigger and end me, right here, right now.”
They looked into each other’s eyes. Their faces were wet with tears. She was sobbing. Hands were shaking.
“I screwed up, Olivia … I made your life a living hell … and I know you hate me for it, so this is your chance … you can pull the trigger and live the life you’ve ever wanted without me.”
He believed what he was saying, though his soul ached for wanting her to love him more than she wanted him dead. But if Olivia had stopped loving him because of what he did, he was done with the world too. He has nothing else to lose but a fragile hope that somewhere in her shattered heart, she still has some love for him.
He held his breath as he waited for the gun to go off in his head. But her hand loosened. She let go of the gun while still sobbing uncontrollably. She opened her arms to him, and then he pulled her in.
“I can’t …” she said. “Help me … I don’t know what to do …” she cried in his arms.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “Please forgive me …” he cried. “I’ll take care of you, baby, I swear it … I will make things better for you … anything you need … I will do anything for you, Livy, I love you so much …”