Broken Hero

“She was your first girlfriend, Ollie. I wasn’t sure if…”

Oh, for the love of God. “Sarah, please.”

“Just trying to look out for you.”

“You don’t need to.” My voice is low. I want her to stop trying to set me up, to reintegrate me, to coddle me.

“Okay, okay.” She leans forward and runs a hand over Sophia’s braid. “I know you wanted ice cream, sweetie, but how about a cookie instead?”

Nora springs to life and I have to wrap an arm around her waist to keep her from bouncing off. “Cookie! Cookie!”

“Can we get the ones with the frosting, Mom?”

“Sure! Why don’t you go with them, Oliver? John and I will follow.”

I tug at the collar of my button-down. It would mean walking through the throngs of people again. Back past the giant speakers, the blaring bass, the chaos. Avoid situations that can trigger it. That’s what we’d always been told with regards to PTSD. But how long would it take until I was sound again? Until I was me again?

“Where do they sell cookies?”

“The Rhodes have a stand. It should be right next to the bouncy castle. I saw Lucy there earlier, actually. She was roped into manning it.” Sarah’s eyes, wide and innocent, meet mine.This content © Nôv/elDr(a)m/a.Org.

Ah.

“Better than ice cream, huh?” I ask dryly.

“Much better. Wouldn’t you agree?”

I roll my eyes at her, but she’s given me a destination, and with that, I might make it through. “Let’s go, girls.”

Nora asks to sit on my shoulders again, and I can see that Sarah wants to protest. I shake my head at her silently. Nora is light, and the twinge in my shoulder is nothing but a faint ache. I’ll be damned if I can’t carry my own niece. Besides, the small pinprick of pain will help me focus.

Sophia slips her hand in mine again and we head off towards the cookie stand. She skips with little bounces in her step, watching the people around us.

“Will you go on the merry-go-round with us later?”

“It’s not for adults. It’s for kids.”

She tugs on my hand. “Both Mommy and Daddy have gone on it, and they’re adults.”

“If I’m on it, I can’t watch you ride it.”

She nods gravely. “That’s true. What does rec-lus-ive mean?”

That’s a big word for a seven-year-old. “Someone who doesn’t like spending a lot of time with people. Where did you hear that word?”

Sophia looks behind her, before smiling up at me with glittering eyes. “Mommy said that you’re rec-lus-ive, but I see you spending time with people all the time!”

Nora grabs a fistful of my hair and tugs, giving an excited squeal. “Cookies!”

“You’re right,” I tell Sophia. “I’m not reclusive, but I’m not as talkative as Mommy. And yes… cookies.”

The Rhodes have set up a large table with a parasol above it. Small, colorful flags decorate the edge. The table is heavy with trays of baked goods. There are thick slices of carrot and coconut cake arranged in a beautiful semi-circle. The biggest trays, of course, are filled with their signature chocolate chip cookies. Nora is bouncing on my shoulders with excitement, and Sophia is staring wide-eyed at the selection.

But I only have eyes for the person standing behind the table.

Lucy’s smile is wide as she hands a toffee cookie to a small boy, and I’m instantly back in the glen, when that smile was turned on me and me alone. She’s changed into a flowery sundress that hits halfway down her soft thighs, with a neckline that shows off smooth shoulders and freckled skin. It would be so easy to tug up it up or to tug down. To tug her close and see that smile up close.

I’ve never wanted like this before. I feel like I might explode from it.

“Come on,” Sophia wails, pulling me forward.

Lucy’s smile disappears as she spots us heading her way-her face temporarily a mask of shock. But then it’s back, and the smile is warmer than before.

“Hello!” Sophia declares. “We would like to buy some cookies, please.”

Lucy drags her gaze from mine to my oldest niece. “Of course! Do you know what kind you want?”

I lift Nora down so she can stand next to her sister, their eyes glued to the vast assortment of cookies. She reaches out with a trembling hand, but I tug it back.

“The lady will package them for you. No touching until you’ve decided which one you want.”

Lucy looks from them to me with warm eyes. Her hair is undone around her face, soft tendrils of hair curling over her forehead and down her neck. I want to push it back and kiss her hello.

“You came,” she murmurs.

“I did.”

Her smile feels intimate. “I didn’t think you would.”

“Neither did I.”

Nora leans in close to her older sister. “Which one are you having?”

“I don’t know yet,” Sophia says.

Lucy grins at me. “And who are these little ladies you’re chaperoning today?”

“My name is Nora!”

“I’m Sophia. It’s nice to meet you.”

Lucy smiles. “It’s nice to meet you too. Is this your uncle?”

Sophia nods gravely and tugs at my hand. “Introduce yourself,” she orders me.

I can see the laughter dancing in Lucy’s eyes and have to stave off my own grin. “We actually know each other, bud. Lucy works up at the Ranch.”

“She does?”