Forty Six
“Don’t worry, I know them all.” He sounded so casual.
“Oh, you had time to talk to them when you came?”
“No, not really.” There was a shadow across his face, his eyes shifted and looked behind her. She turn around, he was staring at Ash.
“Dad, what’s going on?” She could see the silent conversation they were having, the trepidation in their faces was so evident it couldn’t have been clearer if the word were stamped on their foreheads.
Ash stood up and moved toward them slowly, dragging out the seconds he had left to reach her. He sat on the table facing her. He took her hands in his and buried his face in them, her palms felt wet, was he crying? She’d seen him sad, angry and in agony, but this was very new to her. He kissed the inside of her palms and whispered in them. The words sounded like ‘forgive me’, but she couldn’t be sure. He was scaring her.Exclusive © material by Nô(/v)elDrama.Org.
She placed her palms flat on his cheeks and gently pulled his face up, his hands still covering hers. His eyelashes were wet. He was crying! She felt her lips quiver, but fought to keep them straight. “Ash what’s wrong?”
He stared at her, long and hard, and then he pulled her hands back down and pressed his face in her palms, tears were filling the arch her hands had made. She realized this was about his promise-the one he was so sure she would leave him for. It must be really bad for him to be so broken like this.
She swallowed hard, tears dripping down her cheeks but she kept her control, she wasn’t going to get hysterical. “I don’t want to know, you don’t have to tell me!” She was shaking her head hard.
“Tell her about you, if she can take that, then I’ll tell her the rest.” Ash’s voice was shaky; he kept his head in her palms when he spoke.
“I don’t want to lose you! Ash, please don’t tell me, please!” Her voice came out more like a weep, she was begging. Ash pressed a kiss in her palms but said nothing. She cursed herself for demanding this from him at the beginning. She never knew that she would love him so much, and now her stubbornness was about to take him away from her.
She turned to her father and shook her head even harder, her voice trapped by the sobs she was holding in her throat. Dave turned to her, he place arm around her and hugged her shoulders since her hands were preoccupied.
“Honey-”
“No!” She cut him off before he could say another word.
“Please listen.”
“I said no!” she shouted at him, shaking off his arm.
Ash squeezed her hands, but he didn’t move them from his face. “Lee, listen to your father.” His voice was authoritative but she could still hear the shakiness at the edge of it. She went quiet and kept her eyes on his jet-black hair. He wasn’t giving her a choice and yet he was going to hide in her palms. She kept her gaze fixed and her mind busy with all sorts of things, she wanted to block out whatever words would come out of her father’s mouth.
“Merilee, there is no gentle way to say this, so I’m going to come out and say it…” Dave paused, his voice had gotten shaky at the end. He cleared his throat before he started again, “Your mother, Jayson and Alice didn’t die in the fire, and they were…” He stopped. She turned to him, her faced creased in disbelief. She was right, all the years they tried to convince her to ignore the truth. He squeezed his eyes shut. A tear escaped before he brushed it away, he clenched his fists over his lap.
“They were killed by some bad people.”
She stared at him so hard it felt like she could see through his tormented eyes. He kept talking but she was already seeing everything in her mind. It was like she was watching a movie, like she was in the movie, but only through someone else’s eyes. She wasn’t paying attention to him, but to the images that were running through her mind.
There were two big wolves, one over her mother and Alice, the other over Jayson. She watched her mother cradle Alice against her, reaching for Jayson with her other hand. Jayson was like a zombie, tears flowed down his cheeks but he didn’t say a word he didn’t even move, he just stared at their mother. Someone was pleading, crying. Her host was trying hard to move, but he was held tight by something. She couldn’t see him, but his voice was familiar. It was her dad’s voice. Then she saw the wolves rip her brother apart, then her sister and finally her mother.
“No! Stop! Please stop! Don’t, please don’t!” She was screaming out loud, sobbing hysterically, but she still kept her eyes on her father.
Her host went quiet, his head hung low and he was staring at the floor. Then a tiny voice came into the room. The head shot up and around. “Merilee run!” That little voice was hers. She saw herself run out the door, she looked scared. “Go after her!” A big booming voice filled the room. Then she could see the room, rush past her, it stopped when her host hit something and fell with a thud. She saw someone run out after her-her young self, but he came flying back into the house, crashing into the far living room wall.
Three big guys flashed into the house, they looked angry, dangerous. She looked closer, she recognized them, Ash was in the middle, Billy and Joe flanked him. They went at the other people in the living room, hitting, breaking and drawing blood out of all they came in contact with, adding to the blood all over the room.
Her host couldn’t move, his eyes roamed around the two rooms but he didn’t move. Everything went quiet, all the screaming, the sounds of furniture and bones breaking were gone. Then Ash came and knelt in front of him, his eyes were full of sorrow and guilt. The little voice was back in the room. The head turned and stared at her-at Merilee, and then it turned back to Ash. Her dad’s voice spoke up again, and then Ash picked her up and handed her to a tall beautiful woman-she looked like Ash’s psycho, she carried Lee out, she was crying, stretching her hands out toward her-toward the person. Then his head turned, people were talking but he couldn’t hear. Then his eyelids began to close, cutting off her sight, but she could see Ash, he was leaning down toward the person. Then it stopped, as if the stop button had been pressed, and then everything was shaky.
She came out of her trance. She was on her feet close to the door, facing away from everyone. Ash had his hands on her arms shaking her, he was shouting but she didn’t understand what he was saying. She blinked a couple of time, incoherent of her present surroundings. It all seemed so real. It felt so real.
She looked up and met Ash’s eyes, he was leaning over, their faces close enough to touch, his lips were moving. “Lee stop, you need to stop now!” Then he looked above her. “Dave, clear your head, stop your memories, now!” He sounded angry. Why?